今日随机新闻 (轻松一刻：电影院设计成这样真的好吗？.txt)
<p>上班上久了只想拿工资，不想干活，怎么办？</p><p></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F6de7a753j00tbdefl00pmc000wr00kdc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>这位老板跟我想的一样，摆个摊家里都干净多了，6啊~</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F752832b3j00tbdefk006bc000qs00ypc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F4ffe62d6j00tbdefk007ac000qs00ygc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F29b86f05j00tbdefk0022c000qs00hgc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>有人上班赚窝囊费，有人上班纯属为了整活。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F9ca68833p00tbdefk0046c000ic0032c.png&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>童叟无欺的北京胡同大爷卖“最难喝老北京豆汁”走红。</p><p>不愧是“销冠”，大爷胡同售卖老北京豆汁，招牌直接写：最难喝的老北京豆汁。外地游客不信邪纷纷来尝。大爷：好喝不要钱。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F1782865dj00tbdefl00qgc000j600mic.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F20b1d822j00tbdefl00guc000j600dec.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>《好喝不要钱》</p><p>果然销冠走到哪里都是销冠。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fe2e2048cj00tbdefk001cc000cn00m0c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>听说能喝完奖励是“奖励一瓶”。</p><p>果然人在干坏事儿的时候是永远不会累的……</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F33845235j00tbdefm011lc000u900u0c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>其实人的心理就是这样不信邪，吐，那是别人的事，我吐不吐等我喝了再说。</p><p>于是咱叫老板给装半杯尝尝，嘿，您猜怎么着……喝了一口杯子装满了。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Ff0d52046j00tbdefl00avc000d100h5c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>最难喝的豆汁，迎来了最不信邪的游客。</p><p>大爷没有回头客，只有源源不断的新客。</p><p>据说这大爷还被人举报掺屎让警察带走过，后来说是误会。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F39103c7aj00tbdefm00t2c000j6016lc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fedf1a5a5j00tbdefn00v3c000lx00rlc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>一生不信邪的中国人，又来了。</p><p>2月26日（报道），记者从“杭州市中医院”获悉，42岁的周先生乔迁之喜时，收到一盆“滴水观音”的大盆栽礼物。周先生非常喜爱，他吃完饭围着这个盆栽打转，一会捏一捏叶片，一会捏一捏根茎，心中出现了一个古怪的念头。一直听说这个滴水观音的根茎叶都有毒。“真有毒？我还是想试试到底是不是真的有毒。”周先生从茶几上拿了水果刀，削了一节“滴水观音”的茎，挤了一滴尝了尝，“没有什么特别的味道啊。”没想到几分钟后，他的喉咙开始出现灼烧感，然后整个喉咙开始烧。周先生赶紧跑到厕所去催吐……同时他告诉妻子自己吃了一滴滴水观音汁液，需要立刻拨打120。家人赶紧将他送往医院急诊。</p><p>接诊医生根据家属描述，以及患者症状，与急诊科医护人员立即为周先生进行抢救室护理常规、吸氧、心电监护、监测血压；完善血常规、凝血功能、急诊生化、心电图等检验检查；治疗予以洗胃、抑酸、补液促进毒素排出等对症治疗。所幸送医及时，周先生的中毒症状很快得到了有效控制。</p><p>据悉，滴水观音本名叫“海芋”，全株有毒，以茎干最毒。因为富含草酸钙结晶、皂素、生物碱等物质，这些物质会对人体皮肤、食道、胃肠道等造成刺激。如不慎食用（无论生吃还是煮熟）可能都会导致口腔麻木、吞咽困难、恶心、呕吐等症状严重者会出现窒息、心脏骤停、意识障碍等症状威胁生命，应第一时间漱口、催吐，并立即送医治疗。触摸它也容易导致皮肤瘙痒。只要不误食、不接触其汁液，尽量避免徒手接触，是没有危险的，特别是有小孩的家庭尽量不要种植。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/47308112g00tbdefm041pc0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p>你告诉我它有毒了，我也听说它有毒了，但是我不信他有毒。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fc9d1ccd4j00tbdefn00j8c000u0011bc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>神农再世啊！</p><p>先生以身入局，让我们相信了滴水观音确实有毒，要不然也是听说。</p><p>谢谢先生，先生大义！</p><p>（但是千万不要模仿！！！）</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F95b87802j00tbdefn011ac000m800zkc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>选了个最毒的部分去尝试，真是人才啊。</p><p>替我告诉周先生，灯泡吞进去拿不出来，千万别试！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F352b7ce0j00tbdefo00pcc000ol00tbc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F5aeb56b7j00tbdefo00gec000u000uuc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>这个堆坑……要不要也顺便试试？</p><p>2月27日，四川宜宾，邓先生称自己内急想上厕所，结果导航到一个废旧的露天蹲坑旧厕所，旁边没有围栏遮挡，周围是老人健身活动场所。邓先生猜测这里之前是个厕所，导航没有变更过来，感觉有点坑人。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/3f467674g00tbdefo07shc0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p>好嘛，我上学时遇到这种厕所都保守了。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F4a9dbccej00tbdefo00b0c000f000kkc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>这真是雕栏玉砌应犹在……</p><p>你就说是不是厕所吧！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Ff61afd2ej00tbdefr02hkc000u00140c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>该上就上，活人不能被屎尿憋死，捂住脸就行了。</p><p>只要你不尴尬，尴尬的就是别人。</p><p>广阔天地，大有作为嘛~</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F89a24980j00tbdefp00f1c000ho00hoc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>该说不说，这皇帝的新厕挺好，坑里还有餐具，看来服务也不错。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F47f8c129j00tbdefq00crc000o20102c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>今天怕是跟吃喝拉撒有缘。</p><p>近日，浙江一名30岁的张女士凌晨1点突然从床上坐起，走进厨房抓了一把麦片撒在三明治上吃了起来。第二天早上，看着桌上咬了几口的“麦片三明治”，张女士对此完全没有印象，清醒时的她对食物搭配极其讲究，这种“黑暗组合”连尝试都不会。随后她前往浙江医院精神卫生科就诊，被确诊为睡吃症。经过治疗，张女士目前控制住了病情。医生介绍，这种病医学上叫“睡眠相关性进食障碍”，核心是“无意识”。出现这几个信号要警惕：夜间进食后完全没记忆，或只有模糊片段；进食大多发生在睡着后的前3小时，偏爱高糖、高脂的“安慰食品”；还可能会吃奇怪的食物组合，甚至误食非食品。医生提醒：家里食物莫名减少，体重无故增加需警惕！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/71c6f0c4g00tbdefp01oxc0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p>玄学：饿死鬼上身</p><p>科学：睡吃症</p><p>其他: 猪瘾犯了</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F10b0b487j00tbdefp005yc000zk019bc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>好歹毒的病啊，这胖得也太冤了！</p><p>这病最恶心的是吃了好吃的自己竟然不知道……</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F36122351j00tbdefq009qc000eb00koc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>原来这就是我减不了肥的原因，我保准是得这病了！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F46597cd1j00tbdefs01j8c000u001hcc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>……</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F4d6da947j00tbdefr00c4c000j600nac.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>医生：给你们这群馋鬼点面子说是睡吃症。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F60f9a40aj00tbdefr0060c000az00azc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>我朋友：吃了东西有印象也要就医吗？</p><p>我：那踏马是夜宵！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fbfaabc65j00tbdefr003tc000j600p2c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>如果一个人得了睡吃症，一个人得了睡拉症……</p><p>这两个人在同一个房间会如何？</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F540f6a41j00tbdefr003fc000th00uyc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>有没有那种病，半夜起来挣钱的病……</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F69b5ad68j00tbdefr002kc000u000mic.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>对，就像这么无痛赚钱。</p><p>近期，江苏泰州一店铺推出闭关项目，时间为3到21日不等，价格因情况不等从2980到19800元。店铺公开视频显示，有顾客身裹毯子，佩戴眼罩从屋内走出，被有些网友认为是“花钱关禁闭” 。2月26日，该店铺工作人员回应称：“每个人看事物都会不一样，呈现的结果也不一样。”视频中7日闭黑关为私人定制项目，闭关期间屋内全黑，没有电子设备，闭关期间每日会有两餐素食，也不需要全程戴眼罩。该工作人员发送的产品链接显示，闭关项目分为黑白闭关两种，对客人的年龄要求为18-65岁，身体健康，自愿参与。闭关期间不携带包括手机等任何个人物品。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/394205a5g00tbdefs0480c0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/574f69cfg00tbdefs066cc0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p>好家伙，民办拘留所？付费坐牢？</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F4cc5720aj00tbdefs00j1c000oc00occ.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>我把自己关家里储物间，一分钱都不用花，省了19800。</p><p>这种关三天出来我能把手机玩炸。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Faf0ba92ej00tbdeft00mvc000sd00p0c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>想闭关来我老家吧！手机都交给我，睡醒就干农活，一天给我400就行，包吃包住包。我每天拿叉猪器在后面跟鬼一样坐着电动车追着你们。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Ffd8e08d2j00tbdefu01d1c000u00140c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>吃饱穿暖后，人想的东西就是另一个层面了。</p><p>陕西63岁男性在春节期间来到武汉大学中南医院泌尿外科顺利完成阴茎假体植入手术。3月2日，针对高龄男性假体植入手术，该院泌尿外科主任张新华进行了回应。他表示，该患者长期患有糖尿病、高血压等基础病，导致严重勃起功能障碍。此前曾接受过药物治疗，但没有效果，经系统评估后，最终选择手术，“不影响生育、不影响感觉，他老伴支持。”</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F15d46bbdj00tbdefu00rwc000gj00qoc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>银发经济的范围竟如此之广！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F20d11946j00tbdefv01euc000t300t3c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>63岁了还这么有追求，别人都在跳广场舞，老哥直接搞基建，为爱情添砖加瓦！真老骥伏枥，志在千里，老哥伏枥，志在…硬气！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F0fcbdc6bj00tbdefv00odc000j600y3c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>这也是个狠人！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fe8989958j00tbdefu004gc000u0018kc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>这年头，年轻人过的是素然寡淡的，老年人过的是七荤八素的。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fe44c6bfdj00tbdefv00tdc000j600onc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>另一方面，当你在外边受了一年窝囊气又没赚几个钱，想着当年的豪言壮语都没兑现，感觉没脸回家，内心七上八下的时候，你的家人be like：</p><p>“亲爱的爸爸妈妈：明天你们就要出去打工了，我躲在房间里偷偷哭了好多次，我真的好舍不得你们走……”近日，河南商丘一对父母临行务工时，收到10岁女儿悄悄留下的手写信和全部压岁钱，稚嫩文字戳中众多网友泪点。当事人徐先生，他表示，看到信既心疼又无奈，他和妻子打算等过两年有了一些积蓄后，就回老家找工作，多陪伴孩子。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/181748fbg00tbdefv06ysc0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/079e66a9g00tbdefw052qc0008c00euc.gif" /></p><p>不是800，是805，也就是说全部。</p><p>把我一个毒妇都看哭了……</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F8720f357j00tbdefx00fsc000uw00u0c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>背景离乡，是多少父母的无奈之举。</p><p>幸运的是，这对父母能有这样贴心的女儿，这辈子真的值了。</p><p>尽最大可能多陪陪女儿吧，孩子的童年就那么几年。</p><p>生活或许注定要在路上，但爱永远能找到回家的方向。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F01b6b2e7j00tbdefx00gac000j600nvc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fadbb2d1bp00tbdefw005bc000ic0032c.png&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>这完全是我</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F9e2b8540j00tbdefx00exc000j600lac.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>回老家的日子也是住上鸡景房了</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F2ec53a22j00tbdefx003rc000u001efc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>意外继承了前任同事留下的100块！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F0b584b90j00tbdefx005zc000wh01bcc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>我</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F7f8a3cedj00tbdefy008bc000j600k6c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>老师的教资如奶油般化开</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fa345c45cj00tbdefy001hc000j600pkc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>对健身是真爱啊！</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F8ce726cbj00tbdefy001ic000j600eqc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>那我以前简直是在瞎怪自己</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fff7201ffj00tbdefz00x8c000j600x9c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>当你在家扭伤急需冰敷时</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F99fa457bj00tbdefy002mc000iv00nsc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>给家里的省桌装上万向轮，是所有广东人都想干的事。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fb96ebe72j00tbdefy002fc000lj00q4c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F73e52e25j00tbdefy001ec000mh00rtc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>美女来了</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/060fa27eg00tbdefz06z2c000dw00dwc.gif" /></p><p>飘逸~</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="http://cms-bucket.ws.126.net/2026/0304/b3c8a519g00tbdefz02prc000hs00dcc.gif" /></p><p>有道理</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F80efbb76j00tbdefz007jc000zk01nic.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>你买了吗？</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F453797b5j00tbdefz0055c000l300x9c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>好吧？</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2Fd6d6385bj00tbdelt003qc000xi0183c.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F15791bcfj00tbdefz00gec001lb009kc.jpg&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>1、警局内，警察：“说吧，为什么偷东西？”小偷不好意思说道：“我是个怀旧的人。”警察生气问道：“怀旧跟你偷东西有屁关系啊，老实交代。”结果小偷来了一句：“我就想试试手艺生疏没？”</p><p>2、我一个哥们自幼习武，武校出来后被骗入传销。他口才不佳，零业绩，又特能吃，赶又赶不走，因为里面没人打得过他。几个月后，别人都瘦了，他却壮实了。某天深夜，整个组织的人趁哥们熟睡后，集体秘密撤离，就留下他孤伶伶一个人。</p><p>3、朋友结婚时，他媳妇带来一个小瓶子，说以后的日子，每惹她哭一次，就往瓶子里滴一滴水，等哪天，瓶子满了，心也一定死了，会毫不犹豫地离开他。3年过去了，前几天他偷偷给那瓶子灌进两大勺水，被媳妇发现，打了一顿。</p><p>4、八戒和沙僧找到月老，“月老呀。你看我哥俩现在还是单身，你看有合适的给介绍一个呗？咱哥俩的幸福就靠你了。”月老点了一支烟，猛吸了几口，缓缓地说：“兄弟呀。不是哥不帮你们，只是那些姑娘听听你们的名字猪无能、沙无精，就拒绝了。哥也罩不住呀。”</p><p>5、今天，我陪女朋友去婚纱店试伴娘服。旁边一对新人也在试，新娘看中了一款婚纱在跟老板还价，说了好多，爱砍价的新娘突然冒出一句：“老板，你便宜点嘛，我下次还来你这儿租。”坐在一旁喝茶的新郎端茶的手都在抖。</p><p class="f_center"><img onerror="javascript:this.style.opacity = 0;" src="https://nimg.ws.126.net/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcms-bucket.ws.126.net%2F2026%2F0304%2F580e60a0p00tbdeg0004oc000ic0032c.png&thumbnail=660x2147483647&quality=80&type=jpg" /></p><p>有道理！</p><p>
	#endText .video-info a{text-decoration:none;color: #000;}
	#endText .video-info a:hover{color:#d34747;}
	#endText .video-list li{overflow:hidden;float: left; list-style:none; width: 132px;height: 118px; position: relative;margin:8px 3px 0px 0px;}
	#entText .video-list a,#endText .video-list a:visited{text-decoration:none;color:#fff;}
	#endText .video-list .overlay{text-align: left; padding: 0px 6px; background-color: #313131; font-size: 12px; width: 120px; position: absolute; bottom: 0px; left: 0px; height: 26px; line-height: 26px; overflow: hidden;color: #fff; }
	#endText .video-list .on{border-bottom: 8px solid #c4282b;}
	#endText .video-list .play{width: 20px; height: 20px; background:url(http://static.ws.126.net/video/img14/zhuzhan/play.png);position: absolute;right: 12px; top: 62px;opacity: 0.7; color:#fff;filter:alpha(opacity=70); _background: none; _filter:progid:DXImageTransform.Microsoft.AlphaImageLoader(src="http://static.ws.126.net/video/img14/zhuzhan/play.png"); }

	#endText .video-list a:hover .play{opacity: 1;filter:alpha(opacity=100);_filter:progid:DXImageTransform.Microsoft.AlphaImageLoader(src="http://static.ws.126.net/video/img14/zhuzhan/play.png");}